If I Can’t Beat Them…

I officially have given up on European Starling hunting. I instead, am putting up my old plastic martin house, under the eaves of the house and offering it up to the starlings, as a fine place to make a nest and raise young. Hopefully they will be done teaching their little demon spawn to forage and will be on the look out for more housing and I will comply. Am I nuts? No, but there is a method to my madness. Listen and I will tell you.

My pellet gun skills are not even worth the effort. At this point it seems useless to just “make noise” and chase them from the cross-hairs of my yard to the safety of the neighbors only a few feet away. Dozens of Starlings everyday come and feed off my lawn, which in reality is not that many considering starlings have been know to gather in flocks of thousands. But I digress.

No longer will I scare them away. Hopefully I will entice a pair to nest in the old house under the eaves. I will let them lay eggs and maybe even hatch them. At some point I will take over the raising of one of their young and make it a fine pet. Maybe even teach it to talk. I will teach it to say something quite clever, I am convinced. Maybe even take it with me when I do purple martin presentations. Since they are invasive pests they are not protected by law and I can do this. Then my new pet will be the decoy to call other starlings to my “starling motel”. The Starling Motel is owned and operated by the same infamous motel chain that owns the roach motel. Perhaps you have heard of them? Like the Roach Motel, the starling motel will also not allow check-outs.

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